The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
