I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize