ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
