you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
