How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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