we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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