he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Everything about him screamed your future.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
