Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
