Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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