I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
