I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
