I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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