I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
