Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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