so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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