How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
