I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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