okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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