i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
