she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
