don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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