Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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