Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
