so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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