Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
