called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
