I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
