worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
