I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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