summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
