Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
