I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize