oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize