we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
