We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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