can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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