dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize