no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Randomize