omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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