she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
