I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
