me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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