I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
