I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
