I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
