guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
