I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize
