Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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