Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
