Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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